Help Is On The Way
Post date:
Liner Notes:
WHEN: Monday Skirmish September 20, 2021 8pm BST, 3pm EDT, 2pm CT, 12noon PDT
THEME/TITLE: Last Minute - could be a change of plans, procrastination, surprise plot twist, great escape just in the nick of time... what does "last minute" mean to you?
TAGS: skirmish, songskirmish, s092021, feast, last minute
WHAT: We will have a one hour skirmish to write to a prompt.*
HOST: @vivalarayna
Lyrics:
9-1-1 what's your emergency
Help, help someone is trying to break-in
Dispatching help to your location
Stay on the line
Help is on the way
In her house
Sarah hides
Locks the bathroom door from inside
Glass shatters
A creaking door
Footsteps are heard across the floor
Help is on the way
You're going to be okay
Help is on the way
Sarah cries
Silent tears
Trying to calm her raging fears
Nail file
Hairspray
Weapons of choice as she lies in wait
Help is on the way
You're going to be okay
Help is on the way
Creaking stairs
He's at the door
Siren's approach in a thunderous roar
Running feet
Running away
Sarah will live to see a new day
Help is on the way
You're going to be okay
Help is on the way
Please keep your comments respectful, honest, and constructive. Please focus on the song and not the demo.
Comments
What a suspenseful story! I like the alternation between the terrifying break-in and the reassurance of "help is on the way." Nice take on the skirmish!
Very good building of suspense. I'd love to hear what music goes with this kind of story.
Very cool story and take on the skirmish prompt.
Amazing and made my heart race so suspenseful. Good one!
A lot of nail biting suspense which climaxes in relief. Good story.
Great idea and really well written, a complete story, a scary but unfortunately not uncommon issue! kudos
Very intense! You tell a big story without any clutter. My lyricism is just stream of consciousness word bilimia I need to be better at being concise. This was really cool!
Intense and exciting! My heart was pumping! Reminded me of a break in to a house I lived in where the neighbor across the street called me to say someone was breaking into my house and told me to hide away from the living room and not to say anything as she had already called police and they would be there any minute - that was the longest few minutes in my life. You captured that so well here with the punchy short lines that create such suspense and anticipation!
Oh my! I second Liz. This is exciting and I love it. A John Carpenter-inspired piano that builds and builds would be so cool with a lower male vocal narrating the story. Just an idea. Well-written!!
Wow! What a story. Powerful.
Eek! That's a scary story with great details that draw the reader in. I like the use of hairspray and nail file as that really is all that would be on hand. You set the scene quite well.