Posted: Sun, 08/28/2011 - 20:07
Feast/Skirmish
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Liner Notes:
demo sucks, someone is listening outside the room and I sang like I did in 08 (no confidence or volume or anything)
Cool thing about the song though, I've been having insomnia for a few weeks (off and on) and this is about that an also the structure is different for me. It's VVChBCh
good to get a new structure, I wonder if it works.
Lyrics:
I close my eyes in the evening
An hour later I'm awake
I toss and turn through the night time
It's almost more than even I can take
I get up go to the bathroom
Then I try and go back to sleep
I try every trick I can think of
I'm so tired of counting all these sheep
(I woke up on the)
Wrong side of the morning
Wrong side of the day
The wrong side of the morning
I wish the night would slip away
Now I wish that I was snoring
As I'm lying here
And the wrong side of the morning
Would simply fade away, disappear
If my honey would come back to me
If she would only realize
Somehow I could make her see
Why these tears run from my eyes
chorus
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Mmhm! Very fun song, a good rhythm. I like it!
I like the strums in the chorus and the way they emphasize it. I actually really like the vocal. The high register and gentle sound give a vulnerability that's appropriate to the content!
dang that insomnia - horrible stuff. I really associate with the lyrics here, having not got nearly enough sleep for weeks. Really nice chords and melody too - nice change of pace (with the chords and lyrics) in the chorus. Particularly like the bathroom, sheep and snoring references. Good stuff!
I couldn't compose something if I knew my wife or daughter were right there so I get it. But you plowed on through and came up with another good one. Insomnia is pretty tough. I don't really get it, but sometimes I wake up at 3-4am wide awake. I just get up and putz on the computer.
Someone was listening to me, too, from outside the room as I did my skirmish song. My daughter told me mine was too sad.
I like the structure of this, and I like the folk-rock/power-pop groove. I've always dug those kinds of songs.
Also, I dig how you thought of the title relating to insomnia (which I have bouts of). My first thought was of a hangover.
I know what you mean - I've had weeks-long spells of insomnia off and on my whole life.
But at least you're fighting it - this song has a good fighting spirit to it. Voice sounds fine! Really good stuff.
The chorus is very hook-y. The demo is fine - Don't worry about the vocal, for goodness sake!
I like the structure. It gives the song a feel of moving forward, rather than cycling round.
The fast-paced chords keep the mood balanced, sad but not suicidal! The rhymes are neat, and not overwhelming. Great stuff!
yeah, great idea doing the insomnia bit-- and its really a nice one. some great melodic twists here.. great drawn-out chorus there! nice chord changes!
Vocals sound just fine. I like the mix and arrangement. Sounds like a seventies arena rock band unplugged.
Also, regarding the insomnia: Clever. Very clever.