Whispers of You (See Demo 40333)

Whispers of You (See Demo 40333)

kahlo2013's picture
Feast

Tags: 

Demo: 

Liner Notes: 

Skirmish prompt: Whispers/whispering

Since some collaboration musicians have asked for the melody idea that a lyricist has when writing lyrics I put a rough one take iPhone demo of the melody in my head but would love to have a musical collaborator make the words into a song with the melody they hear. I am not wedded to this melody!

Please see/hear awesome demo by Joanne Cooper:

http://fiftyninety.fawmers.org/song/40333

Lyrics: 

V1
sitting by the shore
watching the river run by
I see time passing
as clouds blow in the sky
the air is getting colder
days are growing short
I feel you all around me
and deep within my heart

C
I hear whispers in the willows
I hear whispers in the wind
whispers of your laughter
and the love we were in

I hear whispers in the water
I hear whispers in the rain
whispers of your love songs
that play a sad refrain

V2
underneath the willow
sheltered from the storm
I feel cool rain fall and
long to be in your arms
I wonder what you’re doing
if you ever think of me
I feel the chill of loneliness
as I hug the willow tree

C
I hear whispers in the willows
I hear whispers in the wind
whispers of your laughter
and the love we were in

I hear whispers in the water
I hear whispers in the rain
whispers of your love songs
that play a sad refrain

B
the wind and rain remind me
how everything can change
as I feel tears start falling
faster than the rain

C
I hear whispers in the willows
I hear whispers in the wind
whispers of your laughter
and the love we were in

I hear whispers in the water
I hear whispers in the rain
whispers of your love songs
that play a sad refrain



Please keep your comments respectful, honest, and constructive. Please focus on the song and not the demo.

Comments

coolparadiso's picture

The words and cadence certainly give it that folk feel. Some very nice lines and i really like the almost rhyme style it really works, sometimes it causes clashes but not here

cindyrella's picture

You excel at so much and never disappoint on a skirmish. I love that chorus and the whole feel!

jcollins's picture

Looking at the lyrics...v1 has a nice visual sitting by the shore of a river. Also, the weather is changing...very nice. Love the chorus especially the whispers of your love songs. v2 is very visual too and sad...nice. The bridge features a morph of rain and tears...very nice. Chorus and out...great job Liz, you killed it. I'm ready for the audio now...hold. Nice singing...good melody...can clearly understand the lyrics...I hear whispers in the water I hear whispers in the rain...I wonder what you're doing if you ever think of me....willow tree....chorus...catchy chorus...very nice Liz...yeah, that's how you do it. I enjoyed it very much and we talked about the lyrics...very nice, you killed this skirmish.

JWHanberry's picture

That's a good song. The melody really brings it to life. It's important to hear what was going on for you. I like the different uses of "whispers" a lot. Nice work.

phoenixash's picture

So beautiful, I am i love with the etherealness in your voice and in the melody, it all feels like I've entered an Enya-like dreamscape. You probably feel you need instrumentation, but oh god, this is so good as is, it's really dreamy in all the senses of the word. The story is really sad, deep and mournful, but your voice really makes it all super sweet. Perfect.

Amanda West's picture

Oh I love this line "whispers of your laughter", so evocative Smile
I wish I could sing my lyrics, but I am so very out of tune that no one would have a clue what I had intended Sad This is a very useful skill and you nailed it here Smile

barbara's picture

Such nice textural details telling the physical story along with the beautiful metaphor. I love the repetition in the chorus. You painted the perfect lonely and pensive walk with memories, and the flow of your words and the rhymes are very musical.