the beautiful

the beautiful

Aging Ophelia's picture

Liner Notes: 

based on a true story


If we could only
feel the bones

If we could only make the living live again
inside the walls of paper curled
we'd hear every cry of our wounded
we'd soothe the hurt and low

maybe we'd be
America the merciful

If we would only
watch the eyes

If we would only stand up firm against the lies
as they roll down
we'd break faith with those that don't serve well
we'd give up irrational ground

maybe we'd be
America the Reasonable

If we only
spend more time

if we would give more than ten seconds to absorb
before we grind

maybe we’d be
America the flexible

Oh I’m not of saintly patience
Or perspicacity
still I can see
where I’ve been wrong
pull back from a bad move
before more damage is done
and I'm not so different from anyone

maybe we should free up
maybe we could be
repentent mosaic reparative smartly
upend bad narratives

maybe we’d be
the beautiful

Please keep your comments respectful, honest, and constructive. Please focus on the song and not the demo.


metalfoot's picture

Really like the structure to this and I think your thoughts here are spot on. Too much react, not enough reflect. (I'm in Canada so don't really have a horse in this race so to speak, but in the age of sound bites and social media, thinking and caring and loving seem to be lost arts everywhere!)

Jibbidy34's picture

This concept is so very clever. Excellent wordsmithery! Really digs in and gets you thinking. I'm in the UK but can still relate to this!

3tdoan's picture

Great political commentary without being preachy. The first verse in particular is really strong.

srcoops's picture

Good thoughts! I liked the way you put this together.

Tim Fatchen's picture

If i had a horse in this race (sorry @metalfoot) I'd set it. Would you consider a version which is non-country specific? I see your last line leaves the A-word out...that could bounce back through the song.

jcollins's picture

Wow...this is unique...feel the the eyes...nice. Lots of good rhymes. Pull back from a bad move...I can totally relate to that. Love the ending...maybe we'd be the beautiful. Pretty solid writing. A little dark but ends with a glimmer of hope. Good job on this.