Broken Sunset

Broken Sunset

sph's picture

Tags: 

Demo: 

Collaborators: 

Liner Notes: 

Finally a new tune. The last weeks were spent with the great mystery called life Smile

This song started via the random collaboration forum (http://fiftyninety.fawmers.org/content/random-collaborations). Peter did send me the lyrics with the words "So, here are some off the cuff lyrics. You can interpret and change them how you see fit for the collab. Any of these sections could be a verse, or a chorus, or bridge, etc."
Don't know whether we have a chorus in this tune.

Anyway I had some weird rhythmssection ideas in my head along with the vocals. Bass and drums play an approximation of these ideas.
The guitars came last and are more or less decoration. But I like the direction this tune took.

Instruments:
Drumsounds by EZdrummer
Wal Bass
Hagstrom and Telecopy guitar.

2018-08-18
Reworked the mix with some of the tips concerning vocal timings etc. Would like to work more on the drum programming. Later...

Lyrics: 

Broken Sunset (Lyrics by Peter Arvidson)

This revolver won't do me any good
If I can't fire any bullets
The words that make me think I should
Worry about your silence

Soul crash, broken flask
Sullen window ashes
Pale horse, death mask
Marks you as he passes

Reform, these shores
Beach side ammo cashes
Trigger pulls, so cruel
Onto greener pastures

Wasted fears last long into the fall
When leaves change, and the sunlight fails us all
Check ins from friends can't ever seem to mend
This broken heart sunset that wishes they'd pretend

Lets save the best for last
We'll make it a graceful dance
With such a lovely hollow past
Your future has a fighting chance



Please keep your comments respectful, honest, and constructive. Please focus on the song and not the demo.

Comments

Fuzzy's picture

A really great active bass line.
The doubled vox are effective too.
I like the minimalist guitar - a good choice - quite Frippish.
I'm loving all the space in this piece.
Nice job, folks!!

headfirstonly's picture

I like this a lot - I agree with @Fuzzy's comments, this could easily be a track off a Sylvian/Fripp album. Slick use of the odd time signature - which I'm hearing as alternating 7/8 and 8/8 - to give it a slightly off-kilter vibe that really grabs hold. If you allowed me a few tweaks, I think I'd bring the vocals down and make the backing louder in the first section; it's a great arrangement, so show it off! I'd also cut that last stanza to just a single vocal line, because the different timings of the vocals are fighting each other. And there's about a minute at the end which just features a repeat of the opening bassline which seems to have crept in by mistake! I really dig the lyrics too - but "cashes" in third stanza ought to be "caches" I reckon. But make no mistake - this is a great collab, guys!

Peter Arvidson's picture

I dig it man! Totally unique interpretation and reminds me of Joy Division meets Nine Inch Nails. That guitar work at the end is buttery smooth and made me smile!

Thanks for making it and posting Biggrin

Peter

sph's picture

@Fuzzy Thanks!
@headfirstonly, well the Sylvian/Fripp Live album is one of my all-time faves. That's where the inspiration for this tune comes from. Thanks for the tweaking tipps. There's a lot to be done on this one, I will try to incorporate your suggestions. Oops, the opening synth bassline at the end: that's an export error. Will fix this immediately.
@Peter Arvidson a big thank you for the lyrics

cblack's picture

I lost myself in this song. Always a good sign! Nice work! It just seemed like the perfect music for letting go, y'know?

colgoo's picture

I love that bass line. Love the syncopated rhythm. Great song!

Very cool stuff. Congrats both of you. My attempts into odd time signatures always feel much clumsier than this.

Technicolor Gramophone's picture

I love bass-driven songs like this ... really odd, but in the best kind of way. The pause in the music very effective, and the guitar is just lovely and definitely Fripp-ish. Great opening line in "This revolver won't do me any good If I can't fire any bullets."

katpiercemusic's picture

This is fun and funky! I love the meter... 7/8? I really like the bass and guitar and the part where they cut out and it's just voice leading into an instrumental solo. It's compelling all the way through. Very fresh.