Mattress Universe

Mattress Universe

amusia's picture



Liner Notes: 

My theory about why mattress stores are perpetually in a state of "going out of business" is that they are frozen in time due to a glitch in space-time. They collapse into black holes (due to all the MASSIVE deals and savings) and form their own universe, from which there is no escape. The storefront you see remaining in our world is its last vestige, forever frozen in time on the event horizon. I mean, what other explanation is there?

I started this two years ago and never quite finished writing it until now.


it's our going out of a business mattress sale
at mattress universe
where we always seem to be going out of business

in fact we always are
due to a random glitch in space-time
so come on down today, and help me!

cause i'm trapped in this black hole discount mattress jail
at mattress universe
every exit only leads right back inside

i try to sleep it off
at this point, i've lost all sense of time
no one comes inside despite the biggest sale in eternity

how long must i remain?
as this life slowly rots away
on the most comfortable mattress in the universe?

so come on down to mattress universe

Please keep your comments respectful, honest, and constructive. Please focus on the song and not the demo.


very entertaining, nice bouncy music and an interesting concept. Like a show tune. you could have Marvin from HGTo the G make a guest appearance and ask them questions

Haha what a great jingle. This is such a commercial tune, love the melody and the flow. Great lyrics and a crafty theme. Love that BIGGEST SALE IN ETERNITY. This is a great idea for a song and it's pulled off so well! Good stuff.

kahlo2013's picture

What a delightful quirky surprise! The happy addictive music and the fun words makes me to run right out to go shopping to one of those big discount mattress stores with the huge signs in the window and search for the black hole,

Fuzzy's picture

Oh man, I remember those commercials from back in the 1970's.
Now I know why they were always shouting.
What a brilliant idea; a plea for help disguised as an advertising jingle.
At least they have a comfy place to sleep, although they would have to subsist on bad coffee and stale pretzels from the vending machine.
Really well done.
Your tunes always make me smile.

Woooooow. This is so funny, catchy and inspired! There was an outdoorsy store in my town that had closing down sale after closing down sale and I would always roll my eyes at them, but then eventually they did actually close down! They sure showed me. Anyway I love this, the bits where you've layered a ton of vocals are amazing.

Rob From Amersfoort's picture

Superb! Fun and well executed. There is even space for a little lovely bridge, and the end which sounds like a commercial is the icing on the cake.