Apple Of Eden

Apple Of Eden

Jerry Pettit's picture

Demo: 

Apple Of Eden

Liner Notes: 

OK. Silly mood today, obviously.

So I went to my notebook of "Titles" I've accumulated over the last couple of weeks--my "cheat" for coming up with ideas for The Challenge--and decided on this one today. One of the tools I used for my "Title Accumulation Cheat" was to go through the Oxford Book of Aphorisms and just try and find interesting little quotes and phrases. This one came from there. (Yeah, yeah, I know--it actually comes from the Bible!)

I was apparently feeling a little blasphemous today. Little known fact about me is that my Dad was a minister, so I grew up with all of these Bible stories...although I don't recall having ever been a Believer. Still--fun to have that background. These lyrics came FAST!

I had the song all recorded and was putting it into Vegas Pro video software when I realized that I had entirely left out how I had originally intended to end the song--hence the "Epilogue".

Went with bluegrass, since there seem to be a lot of Bible-oriented bluegrass songs.

I hope it gives you a chuckle.

Lyrics: 

APPLE OF EDEN

Words & Music
By
Jerry Pettit

Eve was walking in the Garden
And she heard a voice up high.
So she cast her eyes on upward.
(It might be a brand new guy!)
But instead she saw a serpent,
Who was cute in his own way;
All curly with a great big grin.
Here's what he had to say:

"This apple here will help you
Know the Evil from the Good.
And after all, ain't that a thing
That people really should?
And may I say, parenthet'c'ly,
'Fore you walk on through the wood.
This apple also happens to
Be really tasty food."

She said, "But Adam told me 'No!';
Not something I should do."
The serpent said,"I think that he
Was only ribbing you!"
Knowing Good from Evil now
Will help you better intuit.
And if perchance you get it wrong,
Say, "The Devil made me do it!"

FIDDLE SOLO

She took a bite and it was good,
And went to find her mate.
She let him have the rest of it.
He told her, "This tastes great!"
Then suddenly he had a thought
He could not put to rest.
For the first time now he noticed
That his wife had real nice breasts.

And Eve, for her part, noticed too
That Adam was well hung.
But I digress. Now things get bad
In the rest of what gets sung.
Jehovah wandered down the lane,
Such anger on his face.
"I've half a mind to kick you both
The Hell out of this place!"

And Eve said, "But Jehovah,
we were bound to make mistakes.
It's not as if you'd warned us
Not to listen to the snakes.
We thought that we were special;
In your image you made us.
We make a tiny little goof
We're thrown under the bus?!"

"Frankly, Adam and myself don't think
That that is very nice!"
But God just scowled and kicked
Their naked butts out Paradise.
Two angel guards with flaming swords,
Blocked the entrance with a chain.
The outcasts shook their fists at them
And spent life raising Cain.

© 2018, Jerry Pettit

Epilogue:
In those times you question
If He cares 'bout you and me;
Remember in this story
He sure cared about that Tree!



Please keep your comments respectful, honest, and constructive. Please focus on the song and not the demo.

Comments

billwhite51's picture

really supreme storytelling here jerry, the writing and delivery is so dedt that it flew right by. so your father was a minister? what sect? i preached on street corners and exorcised winos for a year or so when i was a youngster, but got kicked out of the youth group for singing frank zappa like arrangements of the hymns. im working on a song about my apostasy called the spirit aint in me no more, i think a lot of people who are drawn to the ministry become artists instead when they find their intellect incompatible with church dogma.

Jerry Pettit's picture

He was Presbyterian. I'm not even sure HE believed what he was saying! Smile

Coolparadiso's picture

Made me smile. your voice was perfect for this - a real troubadour song and a lovely fiddle interlude. will get another listen! great stuff heard a lot worse silly hits than this.

This put a HUGE smile on my face. 1,000 points extra credit for "parenthet'c'ly." Killer double meaning on the last line. Love this. Of course, I love everything you've done. Smile

JoanneCooper's picture

ha! This brilliant Jerry. Totally enjoyed this and can imagine singing this at the folk club. Nice use of BIAB. Thanks for your comment on painted lady (no I didn’t play the guitar part... I wish)

Jerry Pettit's picture

We get spoiled by BIAB. Some of the sax solos and lead guitars we've been able to "play"! Smile

3tdoan's picture

This is hilarious, witting storytelling. Well hung, wahahhaa. That "raising Cain" line is a winner. The jaunty country feel and especially the fiddle really suit the mood.

Chip Withrow's picture

What great lyrics, and they sure do fit into the bluegrass template. Smart, fun rhymes. I can imagine Del McCoury's band tackling this one.

katpiercemusic's picture

I hope you take this for the compliment that I mean it as... your voice reminds me of Jim Henson's a little in this. I really Loe the story telling, and you pack a lot of stuff into a very short amount of time. It's effective. I love all the word play that you employ in this too... "ribbing you," and "raising Caine." You clearly had a lot of fun writing this one.