Dress Shopping (I Think I'll Slit My Wrists)

Dress Shopping (I Think I'll Slit My Wrists)

iveg's picture

Liner Notes: 

@Acousticmaddie had a song about a guy who buys a green dress for his girl, because that's what she asked for. She really wanted blue and she hates the green dress.
Originally I was going to title this "Dress Shopping (I Think I'll Slit My Wrists)" but I don't want to get QUITE that dark. I'm in a weird mood. So that's the song that's getting written

Lyrics: 

I'll buy tampons and panty liners without blinking an eye
Talk about make-up techniques, and maybe give them a try
Normally I'm an easy-going, ok, slightly neurotic guy
But there's one place I firmly draw the line

Dress shopping
There's no stopping her for hours
Solids, stripes and flowers
She wanders through the aisles
Digging through miles of cut-rate designer styles
I try to run, I try to hide
Every time I hear the cry

Dress shopping
I think I'll slit my wrists
Dress shopping
Death can't be worse than this
She won't let me sit with the other guys
on a bench at the front of the store
And it's a day-long chore
One that I abhor
Dress shopping
Dress shopping
I think I'll slit my wrists

A line, baby, racer back
"Does this dress make me look fat?"
The only answer is another question
Hold up something as distraction
"What about this hemline?"
"Does it go with these shoes?"
"Now I'll need a strapless bra"
"You lied, this doesn't work at all"
You know you're going to lose

CH



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Comments

cindyrella's picture

This made me laugh! I hate shopping all around, but dresses? Or shoes? Naw. Great flow!