The cosmic joke's on me

mike skliar's picture

The cosmic joke's on me




Liner Notes: 

This is, sadly for me, a more or less true story. decided to join a gym. started using teh elliptical (kind of a combo bike and stairmaster kind of thing, supposedly easy on the knees which was my concern) and... started having pain in my ankle, stopped using it, pain got worse, finally went to a doctor, and i have to wear this silly walking boot thing for like a month or so now, with a diagnosis of posterior tibial tendonitis. D'oh!

(and a friend who just now heard the song described it as 'atheistic and aphoristic' !)

quick iPhone recording...


I went out to exercise
Trying to get down to size
Then I got a rude surprise
While I was at the gym

Pedaling was smooth not rough
Until my ankle said ‘enough’
And just then it became too tough
And that’s what did me in

And the very act of trying to get healthy
Got me five weeks in a goddamn walking boot
If there was a god they would be laughing
If you’re up there god this bullshit isn’t cute

Don’t say there’s a deity
Who arranges all these crazy things
With a sense of irony
who gently pulls the strings

just say it was coincidence
still the timing is ironic
a cosmic joke at my expense
by a god who is demonic

(c) M. Skliar 2017

Please keep your comments respectful, honest, and constructive. Please focus on the song and not the demo.


Powerstars's picture

Ouch! That is super ironic and unfortunate. I really like the vibe of the acoustic. It's sort of an angry sounding progression, but still has the air of silliness that the lyrics demand. I love the lyrics and the profanity makes it even better. I especially like the "a cosmic joke at my expense by a god who is demonic" and "If you're up there, God, this bullshit isn't cute" lines. I actually listened to this one twice because of how much I enjoyed it. Super catchy chorus, reminds me of They Might Be Giants. Great work!

3tdoan's picture

no good deed goes unpunished Biggrin this bullshit isn't cute, but the song is!

cindyrella's picture

Ouch! I hate those boots. I had a stress fracture in my heal and seemed to wear it forever. Sorry and a good song

AndyGetch's picture

We have an elliptical at home. It get used now and again but its really easy to overdo. Sorry for the plight of the singee and I appreciate the humorous angle. As always well done, sounds great.

OdilonGreen's picture

As a long time gym-goer to try to maintain some kind of semblance of good shape, I very much appreciated, and could relate to, this tragic tale. The music is catchy and upbeat, with just the right slight edge of drama and faux-outrage in the vocal performance to make it all the more amusing. Smile

headfirstonly's picture

Fun song, but folks, there is a very serious lesson to be learned here: get yourself *thoroughly* checked out by your doctor before you start on a new keep-fit regime. My cousin decided last year to do the same thing, took up running, went to the gym. He wasn't overweight or anything, but he had a massive heart attack and spent the last six weeks of his life in the ICU. He died a couple of weeks before Christmas. I'm glad your experience was a bit more positive, Mike!