Lost (Demo at #23623)

kahlo2013's picture

Lost (Demo at #23623)

Tags: 

Liner Notes: 

Lyrics: 

V1
Torn fabric
Ragged threads
Worn heartstrings
Bleeding red

Lost gardens
Heavy stones
Paths ending
Growing cold

PC1
Bleeding red
Growing cold
Love grows old

C1
Waterfalls cascade
Turbines churn
Shadows are cast
Love clings to past

V2
Dark corners
Hidden wrongs
Thick cobwebs
Sunlight gone

False doorways
Secret rooms
Damaged souls
Broken truths

PC2
Sunlight gone
Broken truths
Love ends too soon

C2
Black clouds billow
Cyclones turn
Life spins too fast
Love can not last

B
Trying to hold on
Through winds of change
Trying to stay warm
In pouring rain
Trying to believe

Trying to find love
After you have gone

And ends too soon
Love ends too soon

C1
Waterfalls cascade
Turbines churn
Shadows are cast
Love clings to past

C2
Black clouds billow
Cyclones turn
Life spins too fast
Love can not last



Please keep your comments respectful, honest, and constructive. Please focus on the song and not the demo.

Comments

Stephen Wordsmith's picture

Nice punky cadence - stronger, in my opinion, for sticking to stark nouns and adjectives and leaving out structure and exposition (the bridge isn't strictly necessary to understand where you're going with this song, but is a thing of beauty in itself).

kc5's picture

Interesting combination of words. It seems to have a literal and a separate figurative theme in the same words--love lyrics like that as they unfold some sort of mystery in the lyrics. I imagine a foreboding sort of sound to this for music and I think it would fit both the literal and figurative themes well. I hope you find a collaborator who can enhance the feel of these lyrics with music.

Arthur Rossi's picture

Beautiful, elegant short lines with a lovely flow and powerful imagery... It feels like watching photos and contemplating the story that connects them... A very nice and interesting write!

philmcmill's picture

Excellent! Also like the short line bursts, very nice structure, like having 2 choruses.

colgoo's picture

I'm interested in trying this one out, if you haven't already found a collaborator....I love the imagery. The language conjures up notes, rhythm and dynamics just with one read-through. I hope I can do it justice!