The King of July 4th (Tribute to Hot Dog Champion Joey Chestnut)

OdilonGreen's picture

The King of July 4th (Tribute to Hot Dog Champion Joey Chestnut)

Tags: 

Demo: 

Liner Notes: 

You may ask why, when I have three separate theme albums I'm supposed to be working on, and when factors beyond my control render me unable to post any new music between now (Monday) and this Friday, did I still spend the time today writing a stand-alone song completely unrelated to the aforementioned three theme albums?

Because Joey Chestnut's comeback at today's Nathan's hot dog eating contest to retake decisively the Mustard Belt from Matt Stonie after last year's loss (and, incidentally, setting a new record in the process) deserves to be memorialized in song, that's why. And if Bruce Springsteen and Bob Dylan are going to continue to overlook this American hero, I guess I'll have to do it.

Lyrics: 

The King of July 4th (Trubute to Joey Chestnut)
(c) 2016 Odilon Green

INTRO

A year ago today
Two gormandizers took the stage
Joey was the eight time champ
Matt eight years less in age

Joey had a rough year
He and his fiancee had split
He stomach wanted win nine
But his heart just wasn’t in it

And at the end of the ten minutes
When the gorging was all done
Joey had eaten 60 hot dogs
Matt had crammed two more…

… and won

VERSE 1

It’s a beautiful day in Coney Island New York
The sun in shining, the hot dogs are stacked on plates
Matt is looking good, Joey’s looking determined
I’d bet all of my french fries this contest will be great

Joey tells the crowd how he used to play the trumpet
So his cheeks are good at puffing out which helps him in this sport
Matt says he’s determined to keep the Mustard Belt
He beat Joey before and doesn’t think he’ll fall short

CHORUS

How much can the body take?
How much can it eat?
Why would anybody do this?
Why would anyone compete?

I feel bloated after eating
A big restaurant meal
I can’t imagine how eating so much
Would make me feel

VERSE 2

The fans out in the crowd were many tens of thousands strong
Not counting all the millions who watch it on TV
I wish that I could be there but at least watching at home
I don’t get any food spewings landing on me

Joey launched into the lead, and led the whole way through
At the end he’d eaten seventy, and Matt, just fifty-two
And though the contest was a blowout Joey proved he came to play
By eating 70 hot dogs he set an all-time record today

CHORUS

How much can the body take?
How much can it eat?
Why would anybody do this?
Why would anyone compete?

It may be kind of gross to watch
An eater stuff his face
But if I’m honest I’ll admit
I cannot look away

BRIDGE

It may seem disrespectful
For them to waste so much food
When kids go to bed hungry
Priorities seem skewed

But let’s not act so high and mighty
Like this is a unique shame
We waste more money and more food
At every pro sport game

CHORUS

How much can the body take?
How much can it eat?
Why would anybody do this?
Why would anyone compete?

I guess we all just want to
Say there’s something we do best
And though I may not fully get it
On some level I’m impressed



Please keep your comments respectful, honest, and constructive. Please focus on the song and not the demo.

Comments

mike skliar's picture

Ha! one of the few sports events I try to watch every year! (tho I missed it this year).
This is a wonderful song and really explains the whole thing well- and I love the point you made in the bridge about wasting food in other ways.

I actually wrote a song about this contest a few years ago when this skinny Japanese kid named Takeru Kobayashi (look him up) had won for a few years in a row..

A ballad worthy of the champion in question. I don't really follow hot dog eating but I know it's a big deal!

Commenerating a hot dog championship, wow what a great idea and job

tamsnumber4's picture

This is fascinating, you address all of our thoughts on the sport, but make it exciting all the same. Love the Trumpet player part. A wonderful and very overlooked subject, I enjoyed it!

yam655's picture

Competitive eating is my favorite sport!

I don't play, or even watch regularly, but I'll stop and watch it if it is on somewhere. (Which, considering I stream everything these days, doesn't happen much anymore.)

tsunamidaily's picture

i always love a good story song, and love the drama you build up and your color commentary. good job capturing this bizarre competition.