Take Those Words

OdilonGreen's picture

Take Those Words

Feast

Tags: 

Demo: 

Liner Notes: 

The second song in my I've Never Left My Hometown project, in which our hero (who I've just decided to name Coleman, after the Coleman Audio line level selector sitting on my desk) learns his hometown doesn't love him quite as much as he loves it.

Still a bit on the serious side, insofar as there is no over goofiness in the lyrics (I think). I promise that, for better or for worse, this will lighten up soon.

It's also only a minute long, so there's that. Smile

Lyrics: 

Take Their Words
(c) 2016 Odilon Green

VERSE A1

People say
How it’s good that I am loyal
People say
How it’s nice I stick around
People say
Community is so important
People say
That I’m important to the town

VERSE B1

I take their words
And I wear them with pride
To know they value me
Puts the pep in my stride
There’s no finer bunch of folks
I’d rather have at my side
I love the sense of family
A small town can provide

VERSE A2

I overhear
Everyone laughing at me
I overhear
Them asking why I stick around
I overhear
Them saying that nobody needs me
I overhear
Their snickers echo through the town

VERSE B2

I take their words
Oh so mocking, oh so snide
My stomach drops
My heart feels like someone died
I can’t believe
How they hate me, how they lied
I want to flee
But from words one cannot hide



Please keep your comments respectful, honest, and constructive. Please focus on the song and not the demo.

Comments

cindyrella's picture

This reminds of some of the small towns I have lived in. Many are both there to catch you when you fall, while others talk behind your back. I think you did this well!

Love the chord structure and the oboe (?) solo line countering your melody. This little rock opera of yours could go some amazing places I think!

Klaus's picture

I like the music a lot. All the clicking sounds make it feel like it is that busy little town. Strings and especially oboe (?) has a beautiful longing quality. The sweet music makes a nice contrast to the sad rejection in the lyrics. Whole song sounds like a part of some bigger whole - as it should. Good stuff.

philmcmill's picture

Nice little song! I especially like the rhythm and accents of the A verses. The whispers are a nice touch.

katpiercemusic's picture

Ah, small town life and being just a little different. I like how this concept thing is coming along.

corinne54's picture

Your songs are always so interesting both lyrics and music. Makes me have to go and check out the first song!

Chip Withrow's picture

The music has a cool orchestral/chamber music feel to it. Well-done story/character sketch in the lyrics. I'm intrigued to check out your other song now, to see if it goes with this story.

Mt.Mélodie's picture

Nice continuation of the story, like the hectic rhythmic feel, makes it seem like the town is blooming with life and activity. The oboe line really adds to the song, like the shift midsection lyric wise and the whispers. Looking forward to the next sonic chapter of this tale.

I haven't caught the first song yet, but I will make it my business to listen to it. I like this arrangement. Yeah, it does feel a bit sad considering the narrative, but at the same time your delivery is somewhat cheery, almost optimistic in spite of what the townsfolk are saying Smile Your project is coming along well, my friend.

I haven't caught the first song yet, but I will make it my business to listen to it. I like this arrangement. Yeah, it does feel a bit sad considering the narrative, but at the same time your delivery is somewhat cheery, almost optimistic in spite of what the townsfolk are saying. Your project is coming along nicely. Smile

Very interesting presentation on this with with to happy/good followed by the negative/bad feelings. Also find it neat that you have two different verse styles between the A and B verses. Nicely done.

atitlan's picture

Short and (bitter)sweet. Nice work on moving the story forward - really like the way you've used the oboe sound on this.

johnstaples's picture

Enjoyed part 2 very much! LOVE the name Coleman (and the story of how he got his name!) I am sad at the turn of events though! Is he sure they do not like him? Maybe he misunderstood? Nicely done!

Oh and BTW, I just want you to know I see what you are doing here! You are creating a cohesive story to keep us coming back for more (and I LOVE that!)

tamsnumber4's picture

I love the style of this, the name is great, your delivery of this is wonderful and really grabs the listeners attention but also has a nervousness and tense feeling to it, I really like this, can't believe how much you have accomplished already!

headfirstonly's picture

I love the arrangement on this - it totally suits your delivery. And we all love you really, you know that, right?